Old Story
1. One
On a cold winter morning, the warm sunlight filtered through the window, scattering across the room. Yin got up very early, busily packing up his things. It had been five years since Yin went to study in the United States alone, and he hadn't really gone back much. Now, he had graduated, and although his dream of becoming a scientist hadn't quite come true, he had landed a decent job. It was ordinary, but fulfilling. So, he thought it was time to make a trip back home. Moreover, a good friend from his hometown was getting married, and he ought to return to offer his congratulations.
"I'll probably come back after the Spring Festival, these clothes should be enough," Yin muttered to himself as he closed the closet door and began to look around his room, wondering what else he needed to take back with him. His gaze swept over to his desk, pausing at a prominent spot on the left where there was a group photo. The picture showed two children with the appearance of primary school students. On the right stood a short-haired girl wearing an oversized baseball cap, her right hand forming a 'V' sign, looking very lively and cute. In contrast, the boy on the left looked much more wooden, his smile somewhat stiff. This photo was the first one taken of Yin and Ye together, and Yin had kept it ever since. Looking at the 5-year-old version of himself in the photo and then glancing at the mirror beside him, Yin couldn't help but smile and think, "Would that silly little kid ever imagine he'd grow up to be someone like me?"
"Take it with me," Yin sighed, as if he had just been pondering a very serious question. He walked over to the desk, pulled the photo out of the frame, and placed it in his wallet. Then, he sat on the desk, looking at his bookshelf filled to the brim. On the top shelf of the bookcase, there was a large trophy— an honor he received for "Best Pitcher" during a university baseball competition in his graduate school days. Yin had always felt proud of this, although he often played catch with Ye as a child, playing actual baseball only started in university. "Giving this trophy to Xiao Ye as a gift would probably make him very happy," Yin thought for a moment, but eventually gave up on the idea, considering the hassle of carrying such a big object. So, instead, Yin casually pulled a book from the shelf to pass the time during the trip.
"Let's set off."
"Click!" The door was locked. I always feel like something that should have been taken away was left behind on the other side of the door.
2. Two
Due to last night's heavy snowfall, the entire city was draped in a silver coat, with the thick blanket of snow absorbing the bustle of the bustling metropolis. Yin lazily sat in the car heading to the airport, gazing at the swiftly receding scenery outside the window, aimlessly reminiscing about the times he once sped from the opposite direction.
"I'm here! America." Yin kissed the ring hanging on his chest, pushed open the heavy doors of the airport with dreams in tow, and officially set foot on the land of New York.
Arriving in this unfamiliar city for the first time, Yin was very excited; everything was new to him. He walked out of the airport and took a funny pose for a photo with the airport sign.
The car was carrying Yin towards a future he couldn't possibly foresee. In that moment, he silently repeated in his mind, "I will come back, Ye. I will reappear before you in a whole new way."
"If the passing time could also return to its original place like this reversing scenery, what kind of life would I choose again?" Yin watched the advertisements flashing back and forth outside the window, pondering a question that didn't hold much meaning. He knew that he couldn't find an answer to this foolish question, but he couldn't help but think about it anyway. As long as there are choices and gains and losses, one will think about the "what ifs." Yin habitually reached with his right hand, which was propping up his head, across his chest, feeling for something that wasn't there. He looked down, gave an awkward smile.
It was like a videotape being rewound, with different scenes flashing quickly before his eyes until everything returned to the starting point.
After a two-hour car journey, Yin finally arrived at his destination. Stepping out of the car, he stretched his arms and loosened his muscles. The massive airport sign came into view once again. Yin took out his phone, posed as if to take a photo of the sign, but didn't press the shutter button. "Huh, when did I start reminiscing about the past? Could it be that I've really gotten old? No way, I'm still a young literary guy," he thought, still in the pose of taking a photo, his mind a jumble of thoughts.
"Yo! Uncle Sam, I'm heading home now." Yin said with a smile as he walked through the heavy glass doors, feeling calmer than the excitement he had five years ago. Every unfamiliar city brings a sense of novelty and loneliness. But no matter which city you live in, life is always about the simplest necessities: firewood, rice, oil, and salt. Once the glitz is stripped away, Yin learned to love his life in a more serene way.
The roar of the plane carried Yin towards his hometown.
Yin realized he had brought the wrong book onto the plane, and its abstract content made him fall asleep after reading just a few pages, slumped against the seat. The book fell to the side of the seat, with the title page reading:
The things we've lost may not be retrieved, but the memories we've forgotten can be recalled. Cherish the memories.
——Ye
3. Three
Time seemed to have slipped away unnoticed, and by the time Yin awoke, it was probably already dark. He wasn't fully alert and stared blankly at the seat in front of him, trying to piece together the scattered fragments of the dream he had just had.
In the dream, fleeting images of Yin's experiences over the past five years flashed by. There were scenes of him running till he vomited to build stamina for baseball; a romantic relationship that ended before he could even understand its beginning and end; and every time he felt down, he would run to the rooftop of his apartment to feel the breeze… It was these fragmented images that wove together the tapestry of Yin's growth over these five years. These years abroad were as simple and growth-inducing as any other period in Yin's life, yet Yin always felt as if something during these five years was stuck, unable to move smoothly.
After spacing out for a while, Yin's brain, not yet fully escaped from the clutches of sleep, began to slowly clear up. He slid open the window shade next to him and gazed out at the night sky, not knowing over which part of the world he was, uncertain of what to do next. "It would be nice if I could just sleep until we arrive," he thought. However, now that he was awake, there was no chance of falling asleep again. He looked around for something to pass the time. The dull book had been placed by his side by the flight attendant. Even though he was not particularly interested in reading it again, he had nothing else to do, so he decided to let the book continue to "cleanse" his soul.
The plane landed smoothly on the long-missed land. Yin gathered his belongings and disembarked. The warm central air conditioning inside the plane made him forget that it was winter. As soon as he stepped off the plane, the cold air made him shiver uncontrollably. Yin opened his suitcase and took out the coat he had stuffed in before boarding the plane. Accidentally, a grey-silver hand-knitted scarf fell out. He paused for a moment, but the cold air urged him to move quickly. Thus, Yin swiftly put on his coat, wrapped the scarf around his neck, and hopped onto the airport shuttle bus.
Yin said goodbye to the giant bird that had brought him back to his homeland, then disappeared from the bird's view.
The sky was filled with fireworks, dazzling and spectacular. The sounds of the fireworks and firecrackers were so lively that one had to intentionally raise their voice a few decibels to be heard clearly. On a festive winter night, Yin and Xiao Ye strolled down the streets of the small town, engaging in sporadic casual conversation.
"Hey, Xiao Ye, do you know how to knit scarves?"
"I am quite ladylike, you know. Of course, I can do such a simple task~!"
"Awesome, then knit me a scarf. I'll definitely devote myself to you in return."
"As long as you don't devote yourself to me, I'll give you one!"
"……"
Actually, Yin never wore scarves at this time; he felt uncomfortable having something wrapped around his neck. Moreover, with the heart of a young man, he seldom felt cold. He simply wished to receive a gift filled with warmth and affection, just like the protagonists in TV shows.
The distant bell rang twelve times, marking the arrival of another new year. Yin walked on the left side, looking at Xiao Ye's profile, chatting about trivial topics. He hoped that this path would never end, that they could always walk shoulder to shoulder, gazing at that warm smiling face.
Ste out of the airport and seeing faces that looked just like his own, Yin was a bit surprised, but this feeling quickly turned into the warmth of returning home. "I really am back, Xiao Ye," Yin whispered to himself, smiling brightly. Yin's home was in a small town in the suburbs, so he hailed a car by the roadside, letting it carry him and his full heart of longing towards the place where he grew up.
4. Four
Yin enjoyed sitting in the car, daydreaming while watching the scenery outside the window, sketching the city's outline in his mind and imagining some far-fetched scenarios. The city had changed a lot in five years. The billboards hanging on the skyscrapers now featured female stars he didn't recognize, and many places had been renovated to look even more splendid. "Maybe, I really shouldn't have left this place," Yin mused half-jokingly as scenes flashed by the window, waiting for home to slowly draw nearer. The not-so-long drive still took several hours, and by the time Yin got home, it was almost dawn.
"Looks like they've changed the lock." Yin tried to use his key to open the door, but it wouldn't fit. With no other choice, he had to stand at the front door and call his family. It was Yin's mom who answered the phone, "Hello, who is this?" came the impatient voice from the phone, making Yin feel very apologetic. When his mom heard Yin's voice, her tone immediately changed, becoming very excited. The door opened, and both his parents appeared in front of Yin, faces beaming with excitement. Yin, feeling a bit embarrassed for waking them up so early, smiled at the doorway, "I'm back, mom and dad." Seeing their son, whom they hadn't seen much of for years, the parents were obviously too happy to sleep. After a brief chat with Yin, they told him to go get some rest first. Yin watched them go about their business before he walked into his bedroom. Instantly, he was enveloped by the smell of home, a feeling he hadn't experienced in a long time.
By the time Yin woke up, it was nearly noon. He wandered around the house, taking in all the changes that had occurred over the past five years. "Mom still loves to make drastic changes to this poor house," Yin thought amusingly as he looked at his old room, which had been completely transformed. Suddenly, it seemed he remembered something; he squatted by the bed, rummaging underneath it. Soon, he dragged out a rather large wooden box. "Can't believe this thing wasn't thrown away!" The box was locked, and clearly, Yin didn't have the key anymore. However, it didn't take much effort for him to pry the small lock open. The box was filled with all sorts of things: peculiar seashells, cute hairpins, letters received during high school, yellowed photo booth pictures… Yin rummaged through the items in the box while talking to himself, "Turns out, I used to be quite the sentimental girl! What a weirdo, haha." The past is in the past. Yin closed the box, shoved it back under the bed, and walked out of the room. Sometimes, memories of the past can be beautiful to think about, but there are also those that one has to say goodbye to.
Upon entering the kitchen, Yin's parents were preparing lunch. It was a perfect opportunity for Yin to join in and show off his skills. During his five years in the United States, Yin had cooked for himself and had even taken the time to learn how to cook at a local Chinese restaurant because of his initially poor culinary skills. Yin's mother watched her son's focused figure as he cooked and realized that her child had truly grown up. "The once video-game-obsessed mope has now become a fine man; perhaps I really should thank Xiao Ye," the mother thought as she sat watching her son's back. "After lunch, go see Xiao Ye," she suggested. Hearing this, Yin paused, then replied indifferently, "It's not really convenient now; she must be busy. We'll naturally see each other when the time comes." Yin's mother seemed to want to say more, but she ultimately held back.
Having not eaten with his family for a long time, Yin was exceptionally excited, happy like a child. He spoke freely with his parents about everything that had happened over the past five years, as if he hadn't had such an unburdened conversation in ages. Yin's parents looked at their son now and felt a deep compassion for the loneliness he must have faced alone in a foreign place. They knew better than anyone how introverted and fragile their son used to be. People do change, but the personality traits formed in childhood always remain somewhere deep in the soul.
After eating, Yin decided to go out for a walk to experience the changes his hometown had undergone in the last five years. Perhaps he was hoping for a chance encounter with someone, even though he tried not to entertain such thoughts logically. Five years can change a lot; the bookstore he once loved had long since closed down, the internet cafe where he used to spend every weekend playing video games had turned into a bustling supermarket, and the small town had mysteriously sprouted many tall buildings… The plethora of changes made Yin feel uncomfortable, as if the memories of the past were nothing but illusions.
In fact, there wasn't really anywhere particularly suited for leisurely strolls in the small town. So, Yin once again found himself habitually stepping into his high school. Of course, he detested it there during his high school years, because he wasn't able to attend the same school as Xiao Ye. He would always unconsciously fantasize that if they could have studied together, perhaps everything would have been different. Unfortunately, all the 'what ifs' in the world don't lead to outcomes. After graduating, however, he always ended up spending his surplus holiday time here with his friends. Here, although he missed experiencing high school with Xiao Ye, he still made many friends who became very important in his life later on. It was here he understood that different living environments can lead to completely different lives, but these lives are not to be compared as better or worse.
"Huh! They still haven't taken down this dangerous thing?" Yin remarked upon seeing the dilapidated swing near the sports field. He remembered that five years ago, just before leaving the country, he had gazed upon a beautiful full moon from the highest point of this very swing.
Moonlight bathed Xiao Ye, who was sitting on the swing, gently swaying back and forth. Yin leaned against a pillar next to her, kicking at the stones on the ground with his foot, head bowed, silent. He wanted to say something but didn't know where to start, feeling conflicted. All the while, the summer cicadas played their solitary concert.
"When have you decided to leave?" Xiao Ye was the first to speak, which came as a slight surprise to Yin.
"Next month, I guess. You're going to miss me, aren't you?"
"Is that so? Then let me give you a gift as a keepsake. What would you like?"
Xiao Ye paid no attention to Yin's boring joke, merely speaking as she had anticipated.
"a gift, huh? Then, a ring," Yin also switched to a more neutral tone.
"Alright, I'll go take a look around. I'll give it to you before you leave."
After concluding this exchange, both parties lapsed back into silence.
After a long thought, Yin finally mustered up the courage.
"Hey, Xiao Ye, can you wait for me? I will definitely come back. When I do, will you marry me?"
He kept adjusting the tone in which he delivered these words, trying to find a balance between jest and earnestness. But in the end, he couldn't quite turn it into a deeply moving farewell.
"You think it's so easy to marry me? Just go find yourself a pretty foreign girl and be good."
Xiao Ye didn't say anything more and walked away alone. Yin did not chase after her, watching her retreating figure as if she was walking into the moon. He sat down on the swing, tightly grasping the chains on both sides. He really disliked his current self, appearing weak and powerless. Suddenly, he forcefully kicked off the ground, making the swing fly. He wanted to get closer to the warm moon, wanting to shake off the tears on his face.
Time eventually halted the swinging of the swing, dried the tears at the corner of the eyes, and pushed the story forward without looking back.
Yin sat on the swing, lost in his memories for a long time, and when he came back to his senses, he realized it was time to go home. Slowly leaving the swing, he moved forward in accordance with the progression of the story. He knew too well that dwelling too much on the past wasn't a good thing. Yet even he, who considered himself more mature now, couldn't resist the onslaught of sadness at certain moments. He always felt that there was a gap deep within his heart that still needed to be filled.
5. Five
On the way home, he suddenly thought it would be better to buy some fruits for his parents, so he found a good-looking fruit stall on the roadside. He forgot what fruits his parents liked, so he squatted down and tried to choose as many varieties as possible.
"Sir, how much is this pear per kilogram?"
This voice, just like the half-hour recording in his phone, is a voice he will never forget. He looked up and saw the side face that had been outlined countless times in his mind, as if he was stunned. He just looked quietly without speaking or getting up. The woman who was buying the pear took it and turned around, surprised to see the person staring at her. But soon, it turned into a gentle smile.
"You're back!"
He stood up, straightened his clothes, and then spoke.
"Well, it's been a long time. I didn't expect you to keep your hair so long."
"Yes, ladies look better with long hair. You've changed a lot too."
"Haha, handsome, right? Do you regret deciding to get rid of yourself so early!"
He said in a joking tone, his eyes unconsciously glanced at the ring on her left ring finger. As if the ring was too dazzling, he quickly moved his gaze away.
"Huh, you're still so narcissistic."
Her tone was a bit awkward, and he realized that some jokes couldn't be made anymore. For a while, he didn't know what to say. Somehow, he blurted out:
"You look pretty now."
"Thank you." She didn't know what to say to him either. It's been too long.
He was very annoyed that he had brought the topic to a dead end. At this time, she noticed the gray and white scarf he was wearing, which didn't match his clothes at all. She suggested to find a topic:
"You're still so casual in your dress, and the scarf doesn't look good."
He was stunned for a moment, staring straight at her, then suddenly laughed heartily, as if he had breathed a sigh of relief.
"But it's quite warm."
For a moment, it seemed that a certain emptiness in his heart was filled, and the stuck wheel of fate began to turn forward again. Perhaps he had been waiting for this moment in front of her for the past five years, to be able to laugh openly. The next moment, he was pushed forward by fate, and he thought he should have the courage to step into the future.
6. Six
"What a loser! Hiding here and crying by yourself after being bullied? If you're afraid of being bullied, shouldn't you make yourself stronger?"
Yin wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes while looking at the short-haired girl sitting on the steps wearing a baseball cap. The setting sun behind her made it impossible to see her face clearly. That blurred outline made him feel warm.
That was the beginning of everything.
He met her.